Addiction to Sadness

What do you do
when you can't do anything?
What do you say
when they're not listening?
How do you save those
who want to stay lost?
Addiction to drugs
Addiction to lust
What about the addiction undiscussed?

The addiction to sadness
The thought that there's nothing better,
That you can't become greater
That you like this hell you're in
and its easier to rot
than to repent for your sin.

You like it
The way you feel
That God is gone
and hope isn't real

I've been down that road.
God, I loved it.
I loved that feeling of not even trying
that there was no reason for even living.
The thought that I was nothing
not worth a single penny
It was easier to deny I was loved
than to walk up the hill
holding my cross
and seeing his blood

I wasn't worth it
He shouldn't have gone through that pain
I'm a screw up and he shouldn't know my name
God, no! You can't love me!
I can't return the favor, I'm just nothing!
Please leave me alone to die,
to enjoy this darkness I am inside.

Stop God! Stop loving me!
I can't handle the guilt following
I'm not worth it
I have no purpose
Please just let me be useless

I'm telling you I know this feeling
It's the devil yelling and screaming
He's filling you with lies
He wants your heart to die
He can't let you live
He knows you'll survive
You have to kill those thoughts,
those demons inside.

God loves you, just you.
Not your works
Not your words
Just accept his love
his merciful, powerful love
Its the most beautiful thing you'll ever know
Please! Please don't give up hope.